Eyes Full Of Love
You know something? I was asked today about a couple of things that got me thinking. The grey matter in my head started sparking little currents of electricity and thoughts started running wild. I have something that I really want to share with you. Most of you are already aware that I do not, and never have, considered myself unlucky when I look at my child. He is very special and means the world to me!
I can almost hear you asking where this is leading. Well, have patience please – I’ll take you on a road of wonder. A road where not all things are as they seem. A road that some people will recognise, but most of the people in the world would disagree. A road that you may, I believe, already have some knowledge and memories of. The road is one that has been very well travelled by many, many people in the past and is still waiting for navigators of the future. A road that is seen differently by everyone. This story tells you of my travels down that road today aided by remembered journeys made over the last few months.
Some people look at Michael and see him through cloudy eyes that are filled with sad and disjointed views of normal and perfection. Michael, to me, is perfection! He is a child as any other, and was born for a reason. Michael has no preconceived ideas about the way people look at him. He has no idea about the difference between a good person and a bad person. He sees nothing but good in everyone and everything. He is a child so full of love and courage, determined to seek the good that is within him and find it everywhere he looks. Okay, Michael is a child with a disability. A disability that no-one could fail to notice – not a blind man, not a deaf man. But Michael is only disabled when compared to the average walking talking humanoid on earth. So he cannot and will not ever run? So what? That doesn’t take away his right to live a happy and peaceful life! So he cannot and will not ever eat? So what? That so called disability may just save his life. So he cannot and will not ever talk? Well, you are so wrong with that! Michael does speak – he just does not use his mouth! Look at Michael’s face – see how it lights up in the brightest “hello” you can see? Michael speaks with his face and his beautifully expressive eyes! Michael tells you he loves you – just look into his eyes – so full of love and joy – anybody and everybody can see it! The love Michael feels comes directly from his heart. You can see the love shining from his eyes whenever you look at him! Michael is happy to be here – and he wants everyone to know! All the people that know Michael love him. Michael has that ability – the ability to melt your heart with love and compassion. The ability to make you see past his obvious disability and see the courageous and determined child that only wants to be happy.
It is not Michael who has the disability; it is those who fail to see past their own eyes that have a very definite disability. For they have failed to see the joy and love that is there for the rest of the world to see. They cannot see that this little child is not ashamed or angry at what life has given him. They fail to see the innocent beauty of a child who is so wonderfully happy to be in this world of ours. They only see the wheelchair and what that wheelchair means in their much neglected minds. They cannot see that the wheelchair that would act as chains to them, is this little boy’s escape. The freedom that they take for granted is only given to Michael by the use of a wheelchair. But Michael sits proud and strong and does not see the looks of pity. He sees not that people see no further than his chair – and if he did see what they saw? He would smile wider – he would love harder. Why? Because Michael is a child with an advantage on us. Michael’s advantage is that he sees nothing but love and joy everywhere! Love and joy when others around him are seeing normal – plain, bog-standard normal. And all that comes with it.
I am lucky – very lucky! For I have a son who is loved by everyone who knows him and some who do not. Michael is lucky – very lucky! Probably far luckier than any of us. For he sees only the beauty in the world that surrounds him. A seagull making loud noises – that is a reason to smile for Michael. A tatty empty crisp packet? Rubbish to you and me? – Oh such joy does Michael find with that! Windy weather blowing every which way – for Michael that wind is like a strong breath of fresh air stroking his cheek. The rain that falls and means changes of plans to the day’s activities – you should see the sheer exhilaration on Michaels face as the raindrops splash and tickle his face!
Someone asked me why he has to suffer so? How can I watch him perhaps daily or sometimes hourly struggle with pain? Sure, Michael feels pain. Such a tremendous amount of pain in one so young has been unbearable to watch. But Michael is still here fighting for what Michael believes in. He has had several opportunities to “opt” out of this life – but he has fought to stay here on earth with us. He will not give up – he has too much living to do. He is a strong determined little boy who will not give less than 100% to everything. Even when he is so very, very poorly he tries to show his happiness in life, by trying to smile and laugh – if he ends up crying it’s not because of the effort to be happy. Michael is a little boy whom I believe has been kissed by an angel – and he has the mark to show for it. He is nothing other than a blessing sent here for me to love, he is my little angel here on earth and nobody should pity him. Feel sad for him because he is struggling – yes. But not pity – because Michael doesn’t want or need your pity – all Michael wants is the chance to continue his unique, happy and loving life in this wonderful unique world of ours.
So now the journey comes to a pause. Junctions appear in all roads. They are the points at which the journey may change direction. I’d like to think that Michael’s journey will become pain free. But, perhaps, most importantly, I would like to see my little angel shine bright for now and evermore in the knowledge that the world can see him for what he really is:
Michael – A superbly happy little boy. Bless you Michael. Love you forever and beyond, Mum. xx
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